I Can't Be Going Bald This Christmas

from Christmas Is Another Word For Christmas (DELUXE EDITION) by Matthew Bright

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lyrics

I can’t be going bald this Christmas
That’s not on my list of Holiday things to do
I can’t be going bald this Christmas
Cause I love you

I drank some insecticide a week ago
I thought it would temporarily shrink me
But now my hair is falling out in chunks
And I never even got the chance to sneak into Macy’s

I was gonna go there (at night) as a tiny man
With my tiny parachute
And parachute off the giant Macy’s tree
I was gonna do that all for you

But now I’m going bald this Christmas
Because I drank some stuff to try and shrink down to
A tiny insect-man this Christmas
Cause I love you

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from Christmas Is Another Word For Christmas (DELUXE EDITION), released December 20, 2017

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